


implosions

by chanson



Category: HOTSHOT (Band), Produce 101 (TV), Wanna One (Band)
Genre: 1 Sentence Fiction, Canon Compliant, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-01-03
Updated: 2018-01-03
Packaged: 2019-02-27 17:34:39
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,310
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13253205
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chanson/pseuds/chanson
Summary: The world’snot wantononly wild and waveringTwenty-six sentences about Daniel, Sungwoon, and their journey throughout 2017.





	implosions

**Author's Note:**

> just a collection of sentences i wrote in the spirit of reflection and the new year. originally posted [to my twitter](https://twitter.com/chansonettes/status/948135188571099136), but since it got such nice feedback, i decided to tidy it up and post it here as well. 
> 
> self-edited and fairly canon compliant, though i took a few liberties with the timeline. both the title and summary are taken from adrienne rich's lovely [poem](http://plagiarist.com/poetry/3891/).
> 
> i wanted to stick to the single sentence format, but since i am a wordy person, what that really means is that i used a lot of run-on sentences, heh.

**01.**

“That’s Hotshot; they’ve debuted already,” Jisung whispers as a group of stony-faced boys file into the conference room, and Daniel wipes his sweaty palms on his jeans, wondering how much longer until it will finally be their turn.

When Sungwoon looks around the waiting room, all he sees is hope, aspiration, _expectation_ , and tries to recall the days when he too saw a challenge as an opportunity rather than a last chance.

 

**02.**

Ever since he was a child, Daniel has consistently dreamt of two things: dancing on stage in front of a national audience and falling in love with someone who loves him back; it’s crazy to think that he’s only twenty-one and already about to achieve the first one.

“Maybe it won’t turn out the way we hope, but it’s always worth fighting for what you want,” Taehyun says while they’re watching their self-taped dance practice, and Sungwoon turns to stare at his friend, wondering when exactly Taehyun became so wise.

 

**03.**

He stands out despite his short stature because he’s one of the only people who seems at ease in a sea of strangers — “You should’ve been in A-Class,” he tells Daniel with a smile, and thirty minutes later, Daniel adds a new contact to his phone: _‘Hotshot Ha Sungwoon hyung’._

Sungwoon has been in the industry long enough to recognize the signs, and he knows from the moment he lays eyes on Kang Daniel that he’ll shine brighter than Sungwoon ever will — even if Daniel himself hasn’t realized it yet, still clinging onto Sungwoon’s arm with a shy smile as they hand out their support gifts.

 

**04.**

“I’m too short, that’s why people can’t find me on stage,” Sungwoon jokes after the latest ranking announcement; Daniel takes in the tightness around his eyes, the slight slump of his shoulders, and wishes he were better at comforting people.

Cynicism and insecurity are two of the last traits Sungwoon’s friends would associate him with — yet with each passing day, faith slips further from his grasp; it’s why he finds comfort in Daniel, who offers unfailing optimism and confidence in a brighter future that Sungwoon so desperately wants to believe in.

 

**05.**

Daniel doesn’t know how Sungwoon finds him, but somehow he’s standing there, towering above Daniel for once and speaking in a tone that brooks no argument — “Ignore them,” he says, voice firm, but fingers gentle as they skim along his jaw, tilting Daniel’s face so that their eyes meet, “keep your head up and _prove them wrong_.”

“Hey Daniel, am I doing this right?” Sungwoon asks, a coy lilt to his voice as he drags a hand slowly along his inner thigh, and secretly delights in the way that Daniel sputters and his cheeks burn scarlet; fair is fair after all.

 

**06.**

Daniel doesn’t realize he’s been holding his breath until he hears Boa call _“Ardor & Able_— _”_ and he lets out sudden, harsh exhale, feeling wobbly with relief as Sungwoon jogs towards the podium.

“Aren’t you glad you get to spend the next year and a half with me?” Daniel flashes him a cheeky grin and Sungwoon can’t even muster a sarcastic response this time because, _yeah, he really, really is._

 

**07.**

It’s well past midnight, but they’re still in the practice room since neither of them knows how to quit when they have a goal in sight, and it strikes Daniel, as he passes the open water bottle to Sungwoon, that at this very moment, he is truly happy.

“They were on sale,” Sungwoon lies, tossing the bag of jellies at Daniel; he’s been moping ever since their manager told him he needs to be stricter about his diet, and seeing Daniel anything short of cheerful makes Sungwoon feel strangely unsettled, like the Earth is off its axis.

 

**08.**

Daniel feels entirely at home — wrapped around Sungwoon, while they share a mic, knees knocking and fingers brushing accidentally underneath the table — so it catches him off guard when the program ends and Sungwoon turns to him with an icy expression and grits out, “You’re _too close_ , Daniel.”

Sungwoon tells himself that boundaries are important, that it’s not worth ruining the best thing that’s happened to his life over a boy, but Daniel has been shooting him confused, imploring glances since they left ‘Hongkira’ and Sungwoon finally caves; with a sigh, he pats the empty seat beside him and Daniel immediately bounds over, looking every bit the overgrown puppy that the fans always say he is.

 

**09.**

Most people know Sungwoon as someone who talks a lot, but not everyone realizes that he listens well too; he’s the only member who still enjoys hearing Daniel’s rambling stories about Rooney and Peter, and Daniel would probably still like Sungwoon even if he didn’t care about cats, but the fact that he does makes Daniel fall that much deeper.

Sungwoon finds Daniel asleep on the couch — _yet again_ , because he didn’t want to wake his roommates after returning late from a solo schedule — and he drapes his comforter over Daniel’s curled up form; Sungwoon is less sure what to do about the overwhelming fondness he feels building in his chest.

 

**10.**

Sungwoon thinks he’s being subtle, but Daniel hears the yearning sigh he lets out when he assumes Daniel is out of earshot, the audible gulp when Daniel shows up to practice in a sleeveless tank, and the little hitch in his breath when Daniel pulls him in for a backhug; he wonders what sound Sungwoon would make if he kissed him.

It’s Chuseok and since they can’t go home, they make do with drinking games — three beers in, Daniel gives him a sleepy smile and whispers, _“I like you, hyung,”_ and Sungwoon hates Daniel a little bit just then, for continuing to put Sungwoon in positions where he’s forced to break his heart, because if circumstances were different, Sungwoon would’ve given in long ago.

 

**11.**

“We should talk,” Sungwoon says, and Daniel bites back the bitter retort, _sure, now you want to talk_ ; instead, he listens as Sungwoon lists every flimsy excuse for why they could never work, and nods like he understands.

“I just don’t get why you won’t at least _try_ ,” Daniel says, scuffing his shoe against the pavement, sincere and vulnerable in a way that Sungwoon hasn’t ever learned to be; his answer, _I’m scared_ , is on the tip of his tongue, but Sungwoon swallows his words and looks away, wondering why everything is so much harder when it’s about love instead of ambition.

 

**12.**

“What do you want for your birthday?” Sungwoon asks, waving his credit card in front of Daniel, teasing; for once, Daniel doesn’t laugh, just looks him directly in the eye — “You know _what_ ,” he says, voice cracking.

Sungwoon rarely gets angry — sure, he’s often impatient and he’ll play up the faux outrage for laughs — but this side of him — the side that’s ignited with rage and fierce protectiveness, the side that yelled at the staff after watching Daniel’s knees buckle — is one he barely recognizes, and it’s so stupid that it takes Daniel falling ill for Sungwoon to finally realize that Daniel matters more to him than anyone else has in very long time.

 

**01.**

Daniel is twenty-two when his second lifelong dream comes true — he knows it by the way that Sungwoon’s gaze doesn’t leave him the entire time that they countdown to the New Year, as though Daniel is the only future he has in mind.

Their first kiss is short, snuck in backstage at Gayo Daejejeon of all places because Sungwoon is an impatient bastard and he’s already waited long enough, but their second kiss, which happens at the dorm, is longer, lingering — followed by a greedy third and a promising fourth — and Sungwoon resolves that this is the year he will no longer hold back.

  

**Author's Note:**

> i would now like to take a second to officially declare 2018 the year of nielwoon.
> 
> i hope everyone's year is off to a great start so far. thanks for giving this a read! ♡


End file.
